What does it take for your light to shine? Vital to the notion of being the message and letting your light shine is the ability to communicate the essential you. A key element of being the message is finding your voice. It is somewhat ironic that in today’s world that is characterized by instant communication and ‘global reach’ that communication is still an issue.  Just about everyone I know has a smart phone and with the soon release of the iPhone 6 some of us will take smart phone technology even further. Despite this, most of us are still dumb when it comes to deep, interpersonal communication.

In fact, you could go so far as to say this is the number one problem in people’s relationships. There is always something going wrong or awry because of miscommunication, whether that’s at work or home or in your social group. This was exemplified to me in great detail this week as I got sucked into several episodes of Gossip Girl. I thought if anyone is unconvinced of the reality of what the Divine Principle calls the four fallen natures, all they need to do is grab some popcorn, sit back and have the truth revealed, starting in episode 1!

This series, Be the Message is not about what you believe, or think you believe, or what you say, but is about who you are and how that is expressed in your life. If we think about the life of Jesus, only a handful of his words remain. That is astounding – just the red words in your Bible and yet his life changed the world because the people around him were impacted by who he was and how he loved. And then, those people tried to copy his life and their example gave hope to others. Every time you make a decision or take an action, like it or not, you communicate what you believe. The gospel is really only a shadow representation of the real teaching – Jesus’ life and legacy of true love.

Communicating with those closest to you

As we discuss the communication breakdown that we have all personally experienced in our lives, I want you to focus on the people closest to you.  It’s impossible to be the message until you have a communication breakthrough with the people closest to you; your family, your spouse, children, relatives, co-workers friends.

We often get caught up in trying to achieve incredible things in the world, whether it is in our career or ministry – trying to do something great for God, and we’re fooled into thinking we can skip over or family and reach the world. Not true!  The path to Hollywood is littered with people who thought they could be a successful star and simply skip over their family. They may have become famous but their personal lives are a mess.

Similarly, we can’t skip over the church to change the world. God wants us to succeed at every level so we can make the impact we need to make on the world.  If we want to be the message we have to be able to be successful on the individual level, family level, community or church level and then the world.

My call is to my church, but before my call is to Faith Fusion, my call is to my family. Before my call to my kids and family is my call to my spouse. And before my call to my spouse is my call to God.  This is where I get my power from. If I am connected to God, and to my spouse and my family and my faith community I have all kinds of power and energy to impact the world. What I am saying is don’t skip over your family in your efforts to change the world. Instead, through your successful life and family and community impact the world.

Rev. Moon said that “Before you can master the Universe, you must master yourself.”

Making relationships work

Military commanders know if you are going to win a battle the first thing you have to do is knock out the enemy’s communication post. The reason this is crucial is because if they can’t communicate, they can’t organize or counter attack. Or perhaps a closer to life example is Gossip Girls! The enemy knows that if he can break down communication between you and your kids, or you and your spouse, or friends/co-workers then he has you right where he wants you. He can destroy family harmony and any joy you might have in your life.

Another example of how the enemy destroys us is when he successfully stops us from communicating with people who can help us. I saw this clearly in the novel, “Kite Runner.” The main character holds a terrible secret of abuse that was visited on him.  The weight of this awful secret threatens to destroy him. As I was reading the book I wanted to scream, “Just tell someone!”

I want to encourage you to think about the most important relationships in your life. Is there a relationship where you are experiencing a breakdown: a child, spouse, an ex, a co-worker? You are working really hard at it but nothing is working.  There has to be a way out. Ultimately, the way out is to find your “way through” by living the message which is to love as God loves.

It’s not just our situation that is complicated

We are not the only one with a communication issue. Our Heavenly Parent has one too because there has been a breakdown in our relationship with Him. But that doesn’t mean He gives up on us. He just keeps giving and trying. We can learn a lot from that. You can see his efforts as you travel back in time through history.

God’s situation is complicated. Imagine for a moment that you couldn’t directly relate with your child because he or she was out of reach. All communication could have broken down and your child simply didn’t want anything to do with you. This is God’s problem since the beginning; the time when Adam and Eve turned away from their Heavenly Parent. When communication breaks down completely, you are left with few options. This is God’s dilemma.

Just as you might initially reach out to someone estranged from you with an email or letter, God staged his communication with humankind. Of course, He wanted to just be there with them, expressing his love to them, but it’s not that simple.

Our Heavenly Parent from the beginning wanted to reveal his whole heart to his children but they couldn’t understand, so he began with a good word and then a promise with a rainbow, just as you might promise a young child that things are going to be OK.

The Divine principle explains that God really wanted to show people what life was meant to be like. Adam and Eve could no longer be the role models they were meant to be for their descendants. Actually, no-one could and so he worked long and hard to raise people up. He gave Moses the Ten Commandments written on two tablets. The Divine Principle clarifies that one tablet represented Adam and the other Eve. God poured out His love, trying to show how people could develop themselves by following the standard of heart for relationship with God and others.

He eventually sent his son to manifest God’s love in the world. God powerfully communicated His love through Jesus so that we could understand what God is like. And Jesus even promised the Holy Spirit, or the feminine spirit of God, would be with us because we need to understand not only God the Father but also God the Mother. Ultimately, we need True Parent’s love.

Nevertheless, God pouring out his love to us is not enough by itself. We have to be open to receive it. We have to be vulnerable. That means not hiding our weaknesses. It means being vulnerable and admitting our hurts, mistakes and needs.

Taking off our rusty armor

There is a wonderful children’s book, the Knight in Rusty Armor. Although it is a children’s book we can learn from it. It is the tale of a brave knight who fights battles, slays dragons and protects villagers. He is an incredible warrior but when he comes home, he finds he has worn his armor for so long he can’t take it off. The joints have rusted together. This begins to cause a problem in his marriage and with his children. They don’t recognize or respect him without his armor. He’s got armor over his heart and he can’t take it off.

Now of course, the whole point of the story is to examine what happens when we spend so much of our energy going out to conquer the world in our career, excel at school, win, be the best that we forget how to come home and be vulnerable with our family.

There are times when you have to wear armor. What if you did a tough job like police work or social work or you’re climbing the corporate ladder and you wore your heart on your sleeve. You wouldn’t make it. Sometimes we need armor but if you wear it all the time you end up stunting your relationships. You have to have someone in your life with whom you can be totally real; showing your human side with all your limitations, hurts and hang ups.

So, how do you take your armor off? The first step is to reveal who you really are.  You can’t reveal your heart without revealing your hurt. We are fooling ourselves if we think we can hide and it doesn’t matter.

Our Heavenly Parent will work to find a way to restore any sin or painful past. Keep in mind that God is never surprised. There is nothing we can reveal that God doesn’t already know. However, if we don’t own it and offer it to God with a repentful heart then God simply cannot release it. God sees all and is waiting like the father of the prodigal son for us to figure it out and come home. We’re only as sick as our secrets.

The secret that we have been holding on to the hardest is the one that we need to reveal the most. We hesitate to do that because we have this expectation that we should be perfect or at least pretend to be perfect. But that is the fastest way to burn out in your life of faith. You have to have friends and people around you who can accept you as you are; who give you permission to be honest and admit your mistakes.

You can impress people with your successes but you influence people when you admit your weaknesses and mistakes. Don’t try and hide your real heart because you are afraid of rejection.

 “There is no room in love for fear. Well-formed love banishes fear. Since fear is crippling, a fearful life – fear of death, fear of judgment – is one not fully formed in love.” – 1 John 4:18

And I have to admit the scariest thing you’ll ever do in your life is to really risk revealing your heart and love.  That is the greatest risk you’ll ever take is to drop the armor, reveal your heart and risk rejection, but it’s the only way you can love.  It’s the only way you can break through in communication.  It’s the only way you will truly find your voice.

“My strength evaporated like water on a sunny day until I finally admitted all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide them.” – Psalm 32:4-5

We don’t like to admit we’re hurt, that anyone can hurt us, but you have to reveal your heart.  That’s what God did.  He revealed His heart to us.

I am so grateful to Rev. Moon, as more than anyone else; he has revealed that God is a broken hearted God. Our Heavenly Parent put everything on the line for us. So if I’m going to have a breakthrough, before I open my mouth I must open my heart. When I open my heart I will find my true voice to be the message, to be the gospel to others.

To be the message means being willing to be in someone else’s world just as God moves into our lives. The scripture in The Message paraphrased says:  “The Word became flesh and blood, and moved into the neighborhood.”  I love that because it shows that God came right into our mess so that we could hear His message clearly, and if you want someone to hear your message of love, you’ve got to move right into their mess.  You’ve got to move right into their neighborhood and be a part of their world.

Being the message means bringing God’s love into your family, into your closest relationships, your workplace, and your neighborhood. Jesus wasn’t about theology; he was about loving in the right way. He was about principled love. His parables were life lessons and they stuck because they mirrored the way he lived. To be the message we have to shake of our armor, open our hearts and express God’s love and grace in every part of our lives.

When you are connected to God you will naturally find your voice. When you are desperate you find that humble part of yourself that calls out. That is when you will hear from God.

I want to leave you with a special verse today that I hope you can memorize so that it’s always there in the back of your mind and available to you.

“Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.” – Jeremiah 33:3